Taste Patrol

Three Hula Man Bobble Award

My top award goes to all our carpenters: To Ed for butchering his thumb in the quest for someone else’s glory.

To Carl for not betraying one single emotion as Carisa nagged him for three straight days in a row.
To Blair for quietly doing his damnedest to follow Andrea’s vague instructions.

And to Sarah, whose mobile expressions as she viewed Goil’s designs were priceless. She used my favorite diplomatic expression when Goil asked her what she thought of his wall: "It's definitely unique!"

Two Hula Man Bobble Award

Two hula men go to Todd for providing such humane and thoughtful advice to exiting designers. You can see them hang onto his every word as he tells them something positive about their talents, and then wish them luck as they pack up. Todd’s gentle, sane demeanor is growing on me, and I wish he’d been given a more substantive role in this series.

The Bobble Won’t Wobble Award

The Bobble won’t wobble goes to Carisa’s mouth. Zip it, girlfriend. Just shut your trap. Carl’s a saint. I’d kill to have such a patient, talented man working alongside me.

And, yes, many creative folks are a pain in the butt and we shouldn't be influenced by such factors in deciding on whether we like an artisan's work or not, but yours truly dislikes stripes - hates them - abhors them - so I doubt I would ever hire you as my designer.

I’ve also been wondering where I’ve seen your walls before. Then, eureka! Here is Joanne Mattera's painting in all its boxy, striped and dripping glory.

The Trash It Award

The Trash It Award goes to Andrea. I found it interesting that you hated the earth theme, completely forgetting that your winning room the previous week represented mother earth, from the subdued colors, to the textures of wood and stone, to the elemental gifts that earth provides us (sustenance and the raw materials that clothe and house us). You used those design elements quite effectively before, but you were coveting Matt’s and Carisa’s themes so much that you blinded yourself to any creative possibilities. Frankly, your room was lackluster and quite trite in places (plugs of grass!!?)

and I truly thought it should have been your time to go.

Disclaimer: This show has had such a numbing effect on my poor nerves (Carisa’s nonsensical blathering had my brain shut down completely) that I’ve ms. placed my sense of humor. If you find my funny bone, please wrap it tenderly and return it via express mail. I do so love a handsome man in uniform knocking at my door.

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by Ms. Place